The Day Time Stopped

Grief / Thursday, January 18th, 2018

They say time heals all wounds. But what about when time stops? I last saw you 2 years ago today. You came and helped your Dad and I at work. Never saying a word. I gave you money for helping out – “I don’t need this” – truer words could not have been spoken. Time stopped for me the next evening. We got the dreaded knock on the door early in the evening.

My life will never be the same.

Tine will never be the same. It’s a matter of before and after. Nothing is the same. I still cry every day. I want to touch you and talk to you and hug you and tell you that life will be okay.

It’s not supposed to be this way. You were so young, way too young to give up. I wish you would have talked to us, explained to us, trusted us. I guess I wish you could have talked to us, explained to us, trusted us.

For some reason, you thought no one cared and that no one would care. You will never be able to realize the heartache you have left behind. I am completely distraught. For 23 years, I did anything and everything I could for you. Now I have no idea what to do. I drift through each day, trying to find my way back to sanity. I am trying to be here for your brother and sister, but it’s harder than anyone can imagine.

I am torn apart. They need me, but I sometimes I wonder if you might need me more.

Where are you, I wish I knew…
Where are you, should I come join you?
Where are you? Are you doing okay?!?
Where are you?????? I really need to know…
Where are you? I’m coming for you.
Where are you????? I’m dying for you.
Where are you?? I need to know…
Where are you – Everything is fine, everything will always be fine….
Where are you???? I need to know
Where are you??? I’m dying inside
Where are you???? I’m about ……….

I wish someone could explain to my heart – that time heals all wounds. I wish someone could explain to my mind – that it is time to move on and get over it. I wish someone could explain to my soul – that I must learn to live again. My heart stopped, my mind shattered and my soul was lost the day you died.

2 Years

24 Months

730 Days

17,520 Hours

1,051,200 Minutes

63,077,200 Seconds

Tucker Kennedy Shirley

9-21-1992 ~ 1-19-2016


If you know a grieving parent, remember – they will never be the same, and they will never get over it. Time will not heal all wounds, for them, time has stopped.

If you are thinking about giving up, remember – tomorrow is a new day. There will be new jobs, new girlfriends or boyfriends, new friends in general, and always new opportunities. And no matter what you think – people will be devastated by your loss.

6 Replies to “The Day Time Stopped”

  1. As a parent I am filled with sorrow for your loss… My heart is filled with love for you and the loss your family has endured…

  2. It’s almost impossible for a parent to cope with the loss of a child. I can’t imagine the pain. My oldest daughter struggles with depression and we went through a very rough period a few years ago with self harm and came close to something worse. We want to take their pain away but it’s just not as easy as snapping our fingers unfortunately. I’d like to share a booklet that might bring some comfort to you and your family. I hope you don’t mind … 💕💕

  3. I lost a cousin when he was really young, he was 19, over ten years ago and I know that my aunt struggles with the loss of him everyday. I still struggle with his loss on his birthday and on the anniversary of his loss.

  4. I am so sorry for your loss as I can’t imagine the pain you have endured losing a child. My hope is that eventually time will heal your wounds and perhaps with you sharing your story on this platform that you will help others heal too. God Bless you

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *